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The Barak Obama Do It Yourself Speech Kit

Posted on 2014-02-11
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Last Modified: 2014-02-26
Preamble: this must consist of varying portions or iterations of the following; [Place in any order you choose]

“Folks are hurtin’.” [This must be said with feeling, to show caring.]

“We have to invest in the future." [Translation; Spend Spend Spend!]

“We need a balanced approach.” [Remember, this means Tax Increases so make it sound reasonalbe.]

“My hope and expectation is that we can put country before party and get something done for the American people.”
[This is the crux of the speech, this is where it is emphasized that any disagreement is tantamount to Treason.]

[At this point it is important to have an agenda list that will consist of proposals. Use the following skeleton to introduce each of the agenda items.]

--- Obama Introduce a Subject on the Agenda ---

"Some would say..." [Insert here a quotation of something No One ever says.]

“let me be perfectly clear...” [This is the place for obfuscation about the subject and any position regarding the subject.]

"We cannot simply just..." [This is where you mention something that would be the exact solution to the problem and the American People know it, i.e. "we cannot simply just drill for all the oil we need."]

“make no mistake about...” [Here is where the Exact Opposite of any of the things which are to take place are stated.]

“I reject the false choice that some would…” [Again, reiterate quotations that No One has ever said followed by Him vs. an idiotic extrapolation of any Republican position.]

“I have ordered my team to...” [Doesn't matter what actions you fill in here, they aren't going to do it.]

--- Repeat as needed for new subjects ---

Then, in closing you must include a reference to the Bush Administration and "The Failed Policies of the Past." that we cannot go back to. And reference Fox.


Could I use the above to become a speech writer for Obama?
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Question by:bergertime
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Expert Comment

by:Dave Baldwin
ID: 39850923
I think you're a little late to that party...
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Author Comment

by:bergertime
ID: 39851009
Maybe....just irritated because we got our health insurance increase at work today.  But at least the non contributors to society get their free lunch.  :(
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Expert Comment

by:Anthony Russo
ID: 39851145
Do you think it would be too difficult to make one for any GOP politician?

Insert ObamaCare bash.
Insert weak recovery
Insert not enough jobs
blah blah blah

The're all politicians.
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Author Comment

by:bergertime
ID: 39851428
Yeah, but at least with repubs, I don't get the feeling I'm being punished for being responsible.
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Expert Comment

by:Anthony Russo
ID: 39851495
Just the feeling you are getting punished for not being successful enough. They are two sides of the same coin. Most of us are in the middle (not super wealthy and not living in poverty) and neither side is perfect.
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Assisted Solution

by:Scott Pletcher
Scott Pletcher earned 100 total points
ID: 39868942
The *Dems* are the ones that punish the middle class, then tell you how wonderful it is for you.

By far the clearest example is the income tax.  Dems even then "didn't let a crisis go to waste", and pushed through an income tax claiming that:

1) only the top 1% would pay (which was true ... for a few months at least).  "The (rich) 1%" is a perpetual favorite cry of socialists the world over.

2) would *never* exceed 10% [Repubs proposed an amendment to cap it at 10% -- "God only asks for 10%, the govt shouldn't need more" -- ridiculed by Dems as "ridiculous because it would *never* be needed, the govt would **never** even consider taking more than 10%"]

3) would *never* be automatically taken out of your pay before you got your pay (WW II was the excuse for breaking that promise)

How'd those "promises" work out for you?  About as well as "if you like your health care plan, you can keep it -- PERIOD, NO MATTER WHAT".  Which, as Dems will now bizarrely claim was never really a "promise" at all.  Besides, they claim that non-promise was kept anyway!  Yes, astoundingly, they really do claim that Obama's claim was and is "true".  That's about as delusional as one can get, short of being Joe Biden.
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Anthony Russo earned 100 total points
ID: 39869071
Welcome Scott. Nice to have you back.

On the first points, lets keep it in this century rather than stuff that took place decades ago.

On the Obama lie. I agree 100% he lied. Only way to get his bill passed. See we agree on some things.

Anthony
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Expert Comment

by:Scott Pletcher
ID: 39870405
>>  rather than stuff that took place decades ago <<

Like Bush going into Iraq?  Like Reagan's tax cuts?  We hear about those endlessly.

But the *real* thing breaking the middle class and forcing *both* parents in almost all middle class families to work are (1) income taxes and (2) FICA taxes.  Both of which are pushed relentlessly higher (esp. FICA) almost exclusively by Dems (with, admittedly, a few RINOS too).
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