how can i get my love back into my life?

Get on with your life. You are destined to be with someone else.

All good relationships are based on trust.  If she doesn't trust you there is no solid foundation.  Learn from this experience and move on.

Let it go.  If she doesn't want anything to do with you, then stop trying to contact her.  If you keep trying you could find yourself in legal issues.

I've been engaged four times and married twice.  There is always somebody else.

OR

Still get on with your life, when she finds out you've moved on, she might start to re-think her position.  Women always want what they can't have.

Though there will almost certainly be someone else if you take your life forward, we don't choose who we love. And it's hard to let love go. Unfortunately, this is unlikely to go anywhere.

But you can give it a shot.

Is there any continuing relationship at all? I.e., can the two of you have friendly conversations as long as you avoid pushing for more? If there is, there might a path.

It can take some discussion for an issue such as this. Have you given up?

I propose https://www.experts-exchange.com/questions/28736910/how-can-i-get-my-love-back-into-my-life.html?anchorAnswerId=41024534#a41024534 as the solution.